Monthly Archives: August 2017

Ep. #17-Whispers in the Dark

On this week’s episode, things get steamy with 1992’s “erotic” thriller WHISPERS IN THE DARK, a film whose idea of sexy is having respected actors like Alan Alda spout such choice dialogue as, “You probably had a spontaneous emission right in your blue jeans.” And it only gets grosser from there.

Ep. #16-From Justin To Kelly

On this week’s episode, we tackle 2003’s infamous American Idol musical romance FROM JUSTIN TO KELLY, A.K.A. CONTRACTUAL OBLIGATION: THE MOVIE. Kelly Clarkson and Justin Guarini prove to be about as sexy as a case of chlamydia on spring break, while the musical numbers make one yearn for the complexity of a junior high school talent show. And those are the positives. Who says what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger? Oh, wait…

Ep. #15-Bullies

On this week’s episode, we head all the way back to 1986 and take a look at the long-forgotten teen thriller BULLIES, in which a backwoods hick family terrorizes some wussy big city folk. Somehow dirtbikes, bear traps, and borderline-magical Native Americans make their way into the proceedings, but really, everything you need to know about this film can be found by looking at the photos on its IMDb page. It’s hotter than tight ski pants in July in here!

Ep #14-Lords of Dogtown

On this week’s episode, we grind (well, not sexually) on 2005’s LORDS OF DOGTOWN, a skateboarding flick for the Pac Sun crowd that certainly lives up to the “dog” in its title. Brain tumors, Emile Hirsch as a Latino gangster, Heath Ledger with big fake teeth, uncomfortable brother/sister relationships, and Sofia Vergara’s breasts surprisingly all make appearances here, resulting in a totally gnarly takedown, bro.