Ep. #50-Friday the 13th Part V: A New Beginning

This week, in honor of Friday the 13th, we take on the weirdest Jason flick in horror history: FRIDAY THE 13TH PART V: A NEW BEGINNING. As a group of troubled teens try to overcome a variety of issues ranging from sex addiction to homicidal tendencies to, uh, stuttering, a certain masked killer crashes the party. But is it really Jason? Or does someone have an..axe to grind? Somehow 1950’s Greasers, old enchiladas, robot dancing, bomb-threatening hillbillies, diarrhea, and masturbating homeless men all come into play, and we still haven’t even mentioned the dirty penis pants. What are those, you ask? You gotta listen to find out…

Ep. #49-Twister

On this Very Special Episode, we take on the film that serves as the basis for our podcast’s rating system: 1996’s TWISTER, directed by Jan de Bont and starring Bill Paxton and Helen Hunt. Once and for all, we are going to determine if this big-budget special effects extravaganza is indeed the most basic summer blockbuster ever made, or if our entire podcast is built on a foundation of lies. Things get complicated.

Ep. #48-Kazaam

On this week’s episode, we return to the never-ending well that is Shaquille O’Neal’s prosperous acting career and take on his first starring role: 1996’s KAZAAM, in which the NBA legend stars as a 5,000-year-old genie who is summoned from his boombox prison by an obnoxious tween punk to help the kid through his daddy issues. And, naturally, to rap. Meanwhile, there’s a music piracy subplot featuring beloved ’90’s musician Da Brat (whose very existence is called into question by our guest), rampant allusions to slavery, the graphic mastication of goat eyes, and finally, the murder of a child. So, you know, grab the kids for this family classic and enjoy!

Ep. #47-Carnosaur

On this week’s episode, we travel back to the summer of 1993 to tackle an epic dinosaur tale from a Hollywood legend: CARNOSAUR, courtesy of the one-and-only Roger Corman. Wait, was there another dino-related pic that year or something? We doubt Steven Spielberg or Michael Crichton could ever come up with a story about a mad scientist who plans to wipe out the deplorable human species by creating a virus that impregnates women with dinosaurs. Yes, you read that correctly. So skip the trip to JURASSIC WORLD: FALLEN KINGDOM this weekend and instead listen to three guys talk about some cheap dinosaur puppets attacking too-willing victims.

Ep. #46-Hereditary

On this week’s episode, SUMMER BLOCKBUSTER!?! heads to the movie theater to check out 2018’s much-discussed and divisive thriller HEREDITARY, directed by Ari Aster and starring Toni Collette. So is this truly the scariest film ever made, or has A24 pulled another bait-and-switch on horror-loving filmgoers? And what the hell is going on in this movie, anyway? We’re going to get to the bottom of it all, and suffice to say, heads are gonna roll. WARNING! THIS EPISODE CONTAINS MAJOR SPOILERS!

Ep. #45-Xanadu

On this week’s episode, we tackle another ’80’s cult oddity: Robert Greenwald’s XANADU, a roller skating disco musical from 1980 that arrived about a year after disco officially died and is shockingly short on singing. But it sure has roller skating. So much roller skating. And Gene Kelly in what is arguably the most embarrassing swan song in film history. At least Olivia Newton-John is on hand as a neon-emitting Greek muse who pretty much crushes everyone’s dreams. Yeah, this is a confused film. So, naturally, co-host Luke loved it. He should be ashamed.

Ep. #44-The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension

On this week’s episode, we hitch a ride to Crazy Town as we take on 1984’s cult curiosity THE ADVENTURES OF BUCKAROO BANZAI ACROSS THE 8TH DIMENSION, directed by W.D. Richter. ROBOCOP himself Peter Weller stars as the titular adventurer, just your average neuroscientist/rock star/samurai warrior trying to save the universe from an evil alien race hellbent on revenge. Or something. Honestly, this film is incoherent, but that certainly doesn’t mean it isn’t fun. Co-host Luke sure loves it, anyway. Or maybe he just has a crush on Perfect Tommy. Really, we can’t blame him. So grab your oscillation overthruster and take a listen!

Ep. #43-Solo (1996)

On this week’s episode, we’re talking all about SOLO–no, not the new STAR WARS spin-off, but the 1996 low-rent action flick starring Mario Van Peebles as the titular robot. When an android designed to be a top secret military weapon suddenly grows a conscience, he naturally goes on a violent killing spree, the irony of which is completely lost on the filmmakers. But it’s in the name of the weak and exploited, including an adorable moppet, so we’re cool with it. Plus, Adrien Brody pops up as a totally gnarly scientist, and William Sadler is on hand to both chew and devour the scenery as the dastardly villain. Basically, it’s the greatest thing ever. Eat your heart out, George Lucas.

Ep. #42-Self/less

As DEADPOOL 2 snarks its way into theaters this weekend, we take on another Ryan Reynolds flick that was completely ignored by audiences in the summer of 2015: the stupidly named thriller SELF/LESS, directed by Tarsem Singh. When terminally ill billionaire Ben Kingsley has his consciousness transferred into the body of Reynolds, he discovers that going against nature has its consequences. But then he looks in the mirror, and he’s ok. Or not. Somehow flame throwers play a crucial role in the proceedings, which delights all of us here at SUMMER BLOCKBUSTER!?! more than it probably should. Hey, it’s better than GREEN LANTERN, that’s all we’re sayin’.

Ep. #41-Moms’ Night Out

On this week’s episode, in honor of Mother’s Day, we take on 2014’s religious family comedy MOMS’ NIGHT OUT, directed by The Erwin Brothers. What’s a harried mother to do when her obvious clinical depression is getting the best of her? How about a crazy night out with the girls?! Balls will be bowled, kidnapping schemes will be foiled, and stereotypes will be reinforced, all in the name of the Big Guy upstairs. We even brought on a mother/daughter tag team as our guests, who will probably never speak to us again after being subjected to this poison love letter. Happy Mother’s Day!