This week, as the world goes to Hell in a handbasket, we return to a simpler time to tackle a guy who doesn’t seem all that bad nowadays: 1989’s FRIDAY THE 13TH PART VIII: JASON TAKES MANHATTAN, directed by Rob Hedden. Jason is back, and this time, he’s headed to the Big Apple–although it takes him 65 friggin’ minutes to get there, and he spends all of 45 seconds in Times Square. Mostly he’s on a cruise ship/oil rig carving up bland teenagers, one of whom has visions of him as a child, and honestly, none of it makes sense. This is simultaneously the most ambitious and pretentious entry in the series, which are two words we never thought we would associate with Jason Voorhees, although a dude does get his head punched off at one point, which is pretty cool.
Our 2019 Month of Horrors Extravaganza concludes this week as we take on Rob Zombie’s 2009 version of HALLOWEEN II. What was once seen as a cinematic travesty is now heralded in certain circles as a modern-day horror masterpiece. But is there any truth in such bold claims? We try to get to the bottom of it all, white horse and all. Shockingly, what proves most divisive is Scout Taylor-Compton’s lead performance. We anxiously await co-host Luke to admit he is wrong. At least we can all agree that this is better than the last Michael Myers flick we discussed (ahem, RESURRECTION).
Our Month of Horrors Extravaganza continues this week as we tackle 1988’s remake of the sci-fi classic THE BLOB, directed by Chuck Russell. A ball of gelatinous goo has crash landed into a small Colorado town, and it isn’t long before this alien substance starts making a meal of the local residents. The body horror is strong with this one, with lots of goopy practical effects that make us very happy. Kevin Dillon’s mullet isn’t half-bad, either. A pleasant, gross surprise awaits you. OK, we could have worded that better.
The week, we are celebrating both our Month of Horrors Extravaganza and our 100th episode by taking on Nicolas Cage in his most deranged role–1989’s VAMPIRE’S KISS, directed by Robert Bierman. The Cagester himself stars as a publishing executive who becomes convinced that he is turning into a vampire, resulting in whole lot of bug-eyed looks, random hip thrusts, and an accent that can best be described as “unidentifiable.” And just when we thought things couldn’t get any better, the man puts in some plastic fangs. This could be a masterpiece.
This week, we kick off our annual Month of Horrors Extravaganza by taking on 1996’s teen thriller THE CRAFT, directed by Andrew Fleming. Four high school girls get witchy and discover that with great power comes great responsibility…or something. Honestly, the messaging here is a little muddled, and what seems on the surface like a tale of female empowerment becomes more complicated upon a closer look. Honestly, we had no idea it was even possible to devote this much careful thought and analysis to a film like THE CRAFT. We impressed even ourselves is all we’re saying.
This week, we head to the movie theater to check out the latest divisive thriller from Ari Aster, 2019’s MIDSOMMAR. The writer-director of HEREDITARY returns with more artsy horror, as a group of grad students heads to a small Swedish village for its annual mid-summer festival and discovers all sorts of bizarre and violent shenanigans. Grief, feminism, toxic masculinity, dance competitions, inbred oracles–all are present and accounted for, although whether they cohere into something substantial is certainly up for debate. The discussion gets heated. WARNING! THIS EPISODE CONTAINS MAJOR SPOILERS FOR MIDSOMMAR!!
This week, a war between angels in Heaven makes its way to earth in 1995’s ridiculous gore-fest THE PROPHECY, directed by Gregory Widen. God only knows how a slew of respected character actors got roped into this silliness, but if you ever wanted to see Christopher Walken as the archangel Gabriel play the trumpet with a gaggle of adorable moppets, or Viggo Mortensen threaten to shove feces into the mouth of Virginia Madsen, or Eric Stoltz french kiss a corpse, you could do a lot worse. Hell, this film so inspired our guest that he literally breaks into song. Heavenly forces are indeed at work here.
This week, our Month of Horrors Extravaganza comes to an end as we tackle 2006’s spelunking gore-fest THE DESCENT, directed by Neil Marshall. When six thrill-seeking friends take on an unexplored cave system, they battle more than just claustrophobia as they come face-to-face with some very pissed off gollums who seem to have an appetite for lying, cheating, one-dimensional, emotionally damaged individuals. Will our intrepid heroes make it out alive? Or will the obnoxious and reckless Holly ruin everything? Seriously, screw Holly. So take a listen and come explore Cave Sarah with us. (That came out dirtier than we wanted. It makes sense in the context of the film, we swear.)
On this week’s episode, we kick off our Month of Horrors Extravaganza with 2003’s JEEPERS CREEPERS 2, directed by human piece of garbage Victor Salva. In this very stupid sequel to the not-half-bad original, our old pal The Creeper is back, and he’s ready to feast on a bus full of high school boys who apparently are returning home from a basketball game where they were skins. Or it’s quite possible they are all just too dumb to understand how shirts actually work. Regardless, the ick factor is high with this one, and not for the reasons anyone intended.
On this week’s episode, SUMMER BLOCKBUSTER!?! heads to the movie theater to check out 2018’s much-discussed and divisive thriller HEREDITARY, directed by Ari Aster and starring Toni Collette. So is this truly the scariest film ever made, or has A24 pulled another bait-and-switch on horror-loving filmgoers? And what the hell is going on in this movie, anyway? We’re going to get to the bottom of it all, and suffice to say, heads are gonna roll. WARNING! THIS EPISODE CONTAINS MAJOR SPOILERS!