Our 2019 Month of Horrors Extravaganza concludes this week as we take on Rob Zombie’s 2009 version of HALLOWEEN II. What was once seen as a cinematic travesty is now heralded in certain circles as a modern-day horror masterpiece. But is there any truth in such bold claims? We try to get to the bottom of it all, white horse and all. Shockingly, what proves most divisive is Scout Taylor-Compton’s lead performance. We anxiously await co-host Luke to admit he is wrong. At least we can all agree that this is better than the last Michael Myers flick we discussed (ahem, RESURRECTION).
Our Month of Horrors Extravaganza continues this week as we tackle 1988’s remake of the sci-fi classic THE BLOB, directed by Chuck Russell. A ball of gelatinous goo has crash landed into a small Colorado town, and it isn’t long before this alien substance starts making a meal of the local residents. The body horror is strong with this one, with lots of goopy practical effects that make us very happy. Kevin Dillon’s mullet isn’t half-bad, either. A pleasant, gross surprise awaits you. OK, we could have worded that better.
Our Month of Horrors Extravaganza continues this week as we discuss 2009’s DRAG ME TO HELL, directed by Sam Raimi. Alison Lohman stars as a meek loan officer who angers the wrong old lady and winds up with an ancient Gyspy curse. She has got three days to figure out how to stop it before she’s dragged to…well, you know, it’s right there in the title. Raimi is back in EVIL DEAD mode here, but is this a true return to form? All we know for sure is that we never need to see anything enter or leave Lohman’s mouth again for as long as we live. That came across as dirtier than we wanted. Sorry.
The week, we are celebrating both our Month of Horrors Extravaganza and our 100th episode by taking on Nicolas Cage in his most deranged role–1989’s VAMPIRE’S KISS, directed by Robert Bierman. The Cagester himself stars as a publishing executive who becomes convinced that he is turning into a vampire, resulting in whole lot of bug-eyed looks, random hip thrusts, and an accent that can best be described as “unidentifiable.” And just when we thought things couldn’t get any better, the man puts in some plastic fangs. This could be a masterpiece.
This week, we kick off our annual Month of Horrors Extravaganza by taking on 1996’s teen thriller THE CRAFT, directed by Andrew Fleming. Four high school girls get witchy and discover that with great power comes great responsibility…or something. Honestly, the messaging here is a little muddled, and what seems on the surface like a tale of female empowerment becomes more complicated upon a closer look. Honestly, we had no idea it was even possible to devote this much careful thought and analysis to a film like THE CRAFT. We impressed even ourselves is all we’re saying.
This week, our Month of Horrors Extravaganza comes to an end as we tackle 2006’s spelunking gore-fest THE DESCENT, directed by Neil Marshall. When six thrill-seeking friends take on an unexplored cave system, they battle more than just claustrophobia as they come face-to-face with some very pissed off gollums who seem to have an appetite for lying, cheating, one-dimensional, emotionally damaged individuals. Will our intrepid heroes make it out alive? Or will the obnoxious and reckless Holly ruin everything? Seriously, screw Holly. So take a listen and come explore Cave Sarah with us. (That came out dirtier than we wanted. It makes sense in the context of the film, we swear.)
As the latest HALLOWEEN makes its ways into theaters, why not take a step back in time and see how Hollywood tried to destroy one of the greatest slasher series of all time with 2002’S HALLOWEEN: RESURRECTION, directed by Rick Rosenthal. Michael Myers is back, and he’s entering the digital age by targeting a group of dumbass college kids who are part of a live online streaming show investigating the Myers homestead. Yep, this is the one where Busta Rhymes breaks out kung fu on old Mikey, but we’re far more distracted by the details, as we muse on everything from spice racks to equality in the culinary world to gasoline-laced cappuccinos. Anything to avoid the stupidity in the foreground.
Our Month of Horrors Extravaganza continues this week as week take on 1976’s DEEP RED, from giallo master Dario Argento. When pianist David Hemmings witnesses the murder of a young woman, he takes it upon himself to become an amateur sleuth and find the killer. But who could it be? The sexy journalist covering the story? His perpetually drunk best friend? The ghost of a dead child? A bird? Seriously, coherent storytelling is not this film’s best friend. But there are some gruesome kills, and the music is, as described by our guest, “Super Mario Bros. meets Trans-Siberian Orchestra,” making it the greatest soundtrack of all time.
On this week’s episode, we kick off our Month of Horrors Extravaganza with 2003’s JEEPERS CREEPERS 2, directed by human piece of garbage Victor Salva. In this very stupid sequel to the not-half-bad original, our old pal The Creeper is back, and he’s ready to feast on a bus full of high school boys who apparently are returning home from a basketball game where they were skins. Or it’s quite possible they are all just too dumb to understand how shirts actually work. Regardless, the ick factor is high with this one, and not for the reasons anyone intended.